Himself a Defector, a Reporter Looks at What Lies Ahead for North Korean Refugees

Some would have been captivated by the foreign scenery passing outside the bus windows, and some would have prepared themselves for life in the South Korea they have dreamed about hundreds of times, in a secret place, provided by an intelligence agency, in a Southeast Asian country under sizzling weather.

Watching 468 North Korean defectors, who arrived on Tuesday and Wednesday, getting on buses and moving to temporary facilities aroused a mixed feeling inside me.

What would they be thinking on the bus?

Would they know that the hopes they are drawing up in their minds now for their future can be erased one-by-one and return to them as pain? Would they know there is nobody who wouldn’t dampen their pillows with tears, missing their homes that night as they moved into a 36.4 square meter rental house and unpacked their tiny loads of luggage in their new places covered with dust?

Two years ago, when I took my first step at Incheon International Airport, I was exactly like them. I had a moment to decide to swim across the flooded Dooman River, and had to transfer to as many as six prisons in China and North Korea after being arrested. Still, I cannot forget my first night in South Korea: that night, I was looking out at the street with its lavish nightlights, having hopeful expectations combined with fears towards my new life.

Two months later, however, I had to start my first step in settling down as a daily wage-earning laborer, carrying wine boxes to containers under the hot summer weather of August, followed by delivery service, credit card sales, and clothes-selecting jobs. I still cannot forget the human resources officer’s expression in his eyes looking at me when I applied in response to an employment ad and he asked me, “Do you think that your skills earned in North Korea have any relevance here?”

I had to calm myself in front of the eyes of “fellow citizens” when they looked at me as if they were looking at an uncivilized man. I had to fake smiles in the morning at work after spending sleepless nights missing my home. The issue of how to survive, often described as a nice word, “settlement,” was more pressing than any other issue, no matter what dream you possessed when entering the South. I think the starting point of all North Korean defectors is same in this sense.

There will be endless stories that cannot stop, even after talking a month. However, all these stories of the past are of no use. I met a woman in her thirties who started working three days after she came out of Hanawon, the facility for North Korean defectors. I have also seen a man, who never had a job even after one and a half years, dreaming of immigrating to the U.S.

I have met a North Korean defector who appreciated every single day with joy, taking care of helpless old people with his hard-earned money. I also saw another defector who went to prison for selling stolen cars. There is a lot of variety in North Korean defectors’ lives in South Korea.

Many who came from the North will remember the line in a North Korean film called “The Fourteenth Winter.”

“How come our lives now lie in such a distance, while he and I started at the same line.”

Everybody had dreams in their heart when they came to the South. Now they all have the same start. I sincerely wish my sisters and brothers from the North, who crossed the border of death with pain in their hearts, will be able to settle themselves down safely in this soil by putting their honest sweat and efforts into the task.

Reporter Choo Sung-ha graduated from Kim Il-sung University and escaped North Korea in 2000 and arrived in the South in 2002. He joined Dong-A Ilbo in 2003 and is currently taking courses at the International Relations and Security Studies Department at the Yonsei University Graduate School of Public Administration.

zsh75@donga.com