An Era of Stronger Women, Weaker Men?

Listen to the younger generation talk these days, and you may come to think that traditional gender differences between men and women have somehow been reversed. Indeed, the new culture among young adults is characterized by increasingly aggressive women and an equally large population of mild-mannered men.

``The movie `Yuppgi Girl` (Bizarre Girl), where the drunken girl verbally assails her boyfriend saying `You wanna die` actually portrays a very realistic character.`` according to Han-Young Kim (female/21), a junior at Seoul National University. ``These days, more and more male college students are being harassed by female students at special outings or parties for not drinking fast enough or for sitting around with an empty beer or soju glass.``

Kim (female/22), a senior at Korea University, is (in)famous on campus for her `tough girl` image. She can be seen around campus giving out friendly punches to the male students, usually on their heads or shoulders, or spewing out profanity as her native language. Kim explained, ``Female students who were raised up like little princesses in over-protected families want to excel at everything, whether it is drinking hard or playing hard. In the past, female students just pretended to be tough to compete with male students. But nowadays, women are no longer pretending; in fact, there is longer the preconceived notion on what is appropriate behavior for a man or woman.``

``It has become common for middle and high-school girls to be using words like `Ssi-Bah` `Chol-La` `Gae-Shae-Ee` and `Jae-Sup-Neun` that they`ve picked up from Internet webzines.`` lamented a Kim (39), an instructor at an all-girls high school in Seoul. ``Girls these days tend to think that profanity is some sort of common, friendly language to be shared among their members of their age group.``

In this `Strong Female` culture, there also seems to be a growing population of men that are becoming more mild-mannered and effeminate.

Suh (male/28), who will marry his fiancée three years his senior this fall, is one such example. He admits that his interest in personal appearances is rivals that of the women. When his fiancée goes out to get a facial, he always makes sure to tag along. According to Suh, ``These days, you can go to `couple rooms` at skin care centers where you and your girlfriend can lie side by side to receive a facial together. Nowadays, there isn`t really a strong gender designation when it comes to make-up, clothing or accessories.``

Knitting is the main hobby for Kim (male/28), a salaried professional. ``When I broke up with my girlfriend after a year, I had a difficult time regaining my composure. By taking up knitting, I have regained peace in my heart.`` He enjoys knitting key rings and seat covers and gives them as gifts to those around him.

``To be popular with the girls on campus, a guy needs to be cute, mild-mannered, humorous and charming.`` said Lee (male/27), a junior who returned to Yonsei University earlier this year after completing his military service. He confided, ``I had no idea that the world could change so much during my two years away in the military service.``

According to Hyun-Soo Jeon (45), chief doctor at a psychiatric hospital, ``As our society moves away from being group-centric to more individual-oriented, both men and women will express themselves more and more outside the traditional bounds of gender stereotypes.``

Huh Mun-Myung angelhuh@donga.com