Life in my bookstore

November was a hectic month filled with many arrangements to handle: a one-day class with urban sketch artists joining, two rounds of talk shows of authors with new books published and three small meetings for poetry and prose writing and book reading. Added to this, I joined monthly online meetups on sport for all, drawing and poetry transcription. All of such a busyness got me thinking that I did a good job last month.

I have led several small group meetups dating back one to four years at my bookstore. Dreaming of it being part of a humanistic scene of the neighborhoods just as an old nettle tree in an alley on Jeju Island, I have run my own doubling as a book cafe in a tranquil two-lane alley away from a buzzing tourist area for the past six years. Just as other business owners struggling with financial difficulties incurred by the COVID-19 pandemic, I have managed to pay some interest on my loan. Until when could my business hold out? Looking at Biyang island, off the north coast of Jeju island, I try to get all piles of worry and nervousness off of my mind while reading a book. My mother in her 80s always says, “Brace yourself.” I try to take her message as a good-luck charm.

If you ask me how to strengthen a weakening ego, which must require a high level of skillfulness, honestly, I do not have anything to share. I only try to take a deep slow breath and fill in my everyday life with reading, writing, book recommendations and curations, beverage making and dish washing. I have worked my fingers to the bone to fight against a brutally scary tiger putting my life at stake. In return, I’ve got lumbar spinal disc herniation and a tenosynovitis on fingers, sadly. Writing up to this point, I only realize that I manage to cross a shaky bridge end to end every day connecting my dreams and realities, and my job and daily life.