Crazy Love
Journalist: Yeong-un and Yeon-a make love like crazy and they fight violently. They smash fists and even bang head to each other. They swear and call each other names. Is this love?
A: The girl I dated with for five years suffered from her mother who was deeply involved in a pseudo-religious group. The mother hit the daughter with a wooden hanger almost every day because she did not want to join the group. One day, she came to see me about 1:00 a.m. with her body all over black with bruises and crying. We went to a motel and made love. If a man and a woman are in a relationship in which there is nothing to hide from each other, they can open up their hearts and reveal all the instincts they have to each other. When I fought with her, I shouted loud and noisy.
Journalist: How did it happen?
A: It was when I was a college student. On a Saturday afternoon, I turned up some 20 minutes late to see her because I had to sit through a TV program titled Jessicas Detective Story to see who was the murderer. When I told her why I was late, she hit my face, saying, Son of a bitch, do you think I am not as good as Jessica? I endured it without a word until the second hit, but she kept hitting my face with foams at her mouth. I blew up and kicked her on the leg, saying, Is it such a big deal? That night, we made love again. Looking at her thigh bruised, I felt like she was completely mine.
Journalist: In this movie and in your story, it is not love. It is abuse.
A: True love is seeing yourself through the other. Should love be always beautiful? Memories of love are always beautiful, but love itself may not be.
Journalist: Yeong-un and Yeon-a have nothing to hide from each other. However, Yeong-un marries Soo-gyeong, his proper fiancée. Is it that Yeong-un did not marry Yeon-a because she is a hostess at a bar?
A: No, its not because she is a hostess. A man wants to have such a relationship with his girl that you can do anything in making love. Once you reach that stage, however, you regret because you went too far. Then, you want to start all over again in a new and proper way. Thats how love makes wounds. I liked the girl who turned into an animal when we made love. She was so impatient and hot that she couldnt wait the five seconds for buying a subway ticket in the vending machine. When I asked to myself if I could marry such a girl, I got scared and left her.
Journalist: It is cowardly. What if Yoeng-un and Yeon-a got married?
A: They would have hit each others face in the evening and made up at midnight. Then, theyll divorce.
sjda@donga.com
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